I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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