I only kidnapped one of them. chill
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Hello my rib-scented angel!
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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