I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
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