We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize