after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize