well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
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