Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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