dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize