i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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