All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
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I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
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he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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