Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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