I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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