; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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