question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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