I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize