So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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