you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
this just has baby written all over it
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize