look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
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you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
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It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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