How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
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Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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