Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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