I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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