You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize