you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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