Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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