id be glad to
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize