to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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