So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
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Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
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When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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