Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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