I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
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What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
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No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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