it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
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