i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
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