Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize