Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I want a musical about memes.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize