and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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