Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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