oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize