no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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