How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
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