I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Randomize