If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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