Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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