So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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