Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize