Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
even my farts smell like vagina
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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