Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
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