Will you blow on my dice?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize