just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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