I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize