Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize