What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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