real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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